Nightmares.

[webby]

Asleep, on a lonely ledge at the back of the damp, mossy, Riverrush Cave, was a dark form. A wolf's body rose slowly up and down as he breathed shallowly. His face, so unlike it's harsher, concious appearance, was a smooth mask of calm. The caves were silent except for the occasional drip of moisture down the walls, and there was nothing to disturb the loner's sleep. An eyelid twitched, hinting at what dreams may have been occurring in the wolf's mind. Slowly, the muscles behind the twany fur of his face seemed to tense. Kinaki had had this dream before. He knew how it ended, but it always gave him nightmares anyway.

A familiar, empty valley. Lush pastures and open skies. Suddenly, a sharp, resounding crack filled the air with it's menacing sound. In an instant, the dreamer was surrounded by other wolves but no familar faces, panic and terror filling their faces. Claustraphobia started to kick in as loose rocks began to tumble down the sides of the not-quite-distant-enough mountains, and some terrified voice shouted, "Run!"
But Kinaki couldn't leave. Not without the other five - where were they? Why weren't they running too? He couldn't see them everywhere, but he had to get out of the valley before he was crushed by falling debris.

Before the dream had a chance to end, Kinaki awoke with a loud, hoarse yell. His haunted eyes flew open as he quickly jumped up onto all fours, looking confusedly around the gloomy cavern before he remembered where he was. As the echoes of his yell faded away, he suddenly felt ashamed of his weakness. He tried not to show any of his emotions, but he couldn't controll what he dreamt when he slept.

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[captainstumpy]

Fox walked by the cave fronts, he'd eaten a rabbit and cleaned himself by the river. He was surching for his favorate moss lined cave. He hadden't been there for days, instead he'd been resting were he found food.
He was coming close to his cave when he picked up another wolf sent, He stood a second thinking who it was, 'friend or foe?' nither, it was a wolf sent he recenised but not a wolf he spoke to often. He continued walking forward looking towards the cave the sent was around. He peared into it and saw a already awake blue eyed wolf. "Morning" he said politly walking into the enterence casting a large shadow into the dank cave.

[smilies]

Somethings just don't change, the she-wolf, dubbed Almira, thought. She was still procrastinating, still avoiding what was eventually to come. She had to return to Falling Moon sooner her later. But preferably..Later. She wasn't ready to face her former mate, Josiah, just yet if he was even still alive. He was so sweet, so innocent and kind. He didn't deserve to be hurt. Normally, Almira could care less what happened with the males she'd got involved with...But Josiah was different. She'd had pups with him, came extremely close to actually trusting him. Before the earthquake, she'd considered leaving, but she just didn't have the guts to tell him, and see his face and the pain it would show. But truthfully, she was curious. Part of her wanted to see him, to look into his eyes, and then to see what had happened to the pups. Had any survived?

She shook the thoughts from her head. Her heart just wasn't ready to move on to that part, and for the time being she pushed all thoughts of him out of her mind and trotted forward, her nose instinctively leading her to the smell of her kind. Until that moment, she hadn't realized she'd been tracking them, but then, there she was, confronted by a russet-colored wolf. She eyed him for the briefest moment before moving towards him. "Hello," she said while exhaling sharply. She sniffed. There was another present, but he was nowhere in sight. She looked around her, and figured he was in one of the caves nearby. "What you up to?" she asked.

Almira was extremely, naturally comfortable around all males. She'd had enough experience to know their type, so it was simple for her. She talked to them as if they were life long friends.

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[captainstumpy]

Fox turned to the new female, he was pretty sure he hadden't met her before but she was polite and sounded friendly, "Good morning Ma'am" he said with a smile stairing at her. He walked backwards alittle so the wolf in the cave had more light. "Come here often?" Fox asked politly tilting his head to one side, but keeping his blue eyes on the female.

[smilies]

She followed his gaze to the den. Apparently, she wasn't the only one who thought there was someone here. She stepped away from the den a bit and then returned her gaze to the male in front of her. In these unknown lands it was hard to assume what kind of wolves were here. And maybe this one wouldn't take too kindly to a disturbance. She plopped down to her belly, her tail curling neatly around her hind legs, her irises focused carefully on the male above her.

She laughed lightly. "Not quite," she said, lifting her head from her paws. "I've just come to the valley," she told him. "You?" she questionedc, her head tilting momentarily to the side and then returning to its previous position. Craning her neck, she peered over her shoulder at the den. Hmmm... she thought. One ear twitched back as she eyed the den which held the dark mystery inside. "Let's have some fun," she murmured, pushing herself to her feet, and trotting over to the den.

She stood at the entrance momentarily, peering inside. Because of the black abyss inside, she couldn't see anywhere past three feet in front of her. Parting her jaws, she let three sharp, clearly audible barks. Surely enough to awaken the wolf within. Her ears pricked as she listened to echo bounce off the walls of the den and then die down. Soon after, she trotted back to the loner and sat, facing the den, her eyes flicking from side to side, awaiting the revelation of the wolf inside.

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[webby]

"Feck off," Kinaki replied conversationally to the first wolf's polite greeting. He felt vaguely irritated at the fact that someone had heard him yell due to his nightmare, but he couldn't really be bothered to be too upset about it. He wasn't exactly apathetic, more stone-dead to the world because it required too much emotion and enthusiasm in general - what he was so lacking in. At the thought of what little energy he was putting into life, he snorted at himself. Anyone would think I was going grey, he mused. Then he had to remind himself that he didn't care what other people thought, he was a loner now. He used to be a fairly decent wolf too, before the bliddy earthquake.

He didn't bother to come forward to greet the other wolf properly, and instead chose to remain in the inky gloom of the cave where he hopefully would not be disturbed. Coffee-coloured ears flickering, he realised that another voice seemed to have joined the other. Whoopee, a mothers' bliddy meeting just as he was trying to get some peace. Still, he couldn't help but find himself listening in a little to their conversation. By the sounds of it, it was a young male and a newcomer-shewolf.

The shewolf seemed determined to make herself a nuisance. Let's have some fun, he heard, quickly followed by three irritatingly yappy barks. What was she playing at? Kinaki was not some sort of caged beast to be prodded and poked at until it responded furiously. Besides, if that was her idea of having fun.... Not allowing his irritation levels to rise, he took is time stretching, yawning, and then taking a few steps towards the pair of intruders into his peace.

"Do you mind?" His tone was not agressive, but a little derisive.

[captainstumpy]

Fox grinned to the young she-wolf, "Names Fox" he said chearfully. he watched with a grin as she barked playfuly at the wolf inside the cave. His grin soon changed as a rather grouchy wolf came out of the shadows, 'this isn't as fun as i first thought' he thought to himself backing up a little. "It was only a joke old wolf" he said "No harm done" he continued keeping his eyes on the tired wolf, Fox didn't show any aggresion it was only a joke but looked like he didn't take it as one.

[smilies]

Almira smirked, and began packing in the den's entrance. "Mmm..Such vulgar language," she commented slyly, letting her eyes linger on the entrance for a little longer than normal. "That's certainly no way to treat your guests," she added, loving the fact that she could be getting under the unknown wolf's skin. She glanced back at Fox and allowed a grin to sprawl across her slender maw. "Relax, hun, I won't let him hurt you," she said with a laugh, trotting away from the den a bit. She could rustling from inside and considering the fact that she wasn't sure what to expect from this wolf, she decided to stay cautious. Instinctively her muscles tensed and her hackles rose, but other than that nothing other than pure delight showed on her features.

She glanced at Fox a second time. "Pleasure to meet you," she said with a wink, before returning her eyes to the gloomy entrance of the den. Patiently, she waited the male to expose himself, her tail wagging ever so slightly to show that she was nowhere near being threatened by this wolf. Her ears swiveled upon her head as a voice erupted from the mouth of he cave followed by a figure standing within the shadows, his lithe form silhoutted, but his features still remained hidden.

She released a laugh at his question. "Not at all," she said smugly. "We're bored, and need some...Spice to this little social gathering," she said with a matter-of-fact tone. "Care to join us?" she asked, her smile welcoming, although deep down she felt as if she knew what his answer would be.

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[Malo]

On the move, as always. Two wolves approached the cave, obviously smelling the others, but not really putting much thought into making their presence known. One, the younger wolf on the left, was a brown-hued female. Her green eyes looked around anxiously, scanning the terrain as if nervous. But since when was Fallon ever nervous? Her companion, a mostly black male with gold and gray markings, trotted slowly, taking his surroundings in. He flashed his violet eyes to her, and raised an eyebrow.

What's wrong pup? Something bothering you?[/color] He chuckled. Fallon cut her eyes at him, then scowled. Nothing is wrong, Dalryx. Quit being annoying,[/color] she snapped, then turned away. But to be honest, something was wrong.

One of the wolves, one of the ones they smelled, was different. The scent stood out to the young female, stronger than the other two combined. She had grown up with that smell, it was the first she'd ever known. One that had brought her comfort at such an early age, but as of late had often haunted her in her dreams. It was her mother's scent. Almira was back.

Looking at Dalryx, she rolled her eyes and made a sharp turn to her left, afraid of what she might find when she reached the source of the smell. Her mind raced, and legs carried her quickly. She felt as if she were dreaming. Was her mother really here in Caden valley? Would Fallon really see her again? Dalryx, noticing his companion had wandered off, turned to follow her. He had to run to catch up with her. Hey Dollface, where you goin'?[/color] But Fallon paid him no mind, just kept running, running to her mother who she'd dreamed of and been tortured by for so many months. ||Damn you, Almira.||


Finally, after only a few moments that felt like an eternity to the she-wolf, they stumbled upon the cave. They saw two wolves standing at the entrance, their backs turned to them, and they smelt a third in the den. They were quiet upon arrival, and Fallon took a slow step forward. She opened her mouth to speak, to call out to her mother, but nothing came. Instead, she shut her mouth and waited to be smelt. Waited for her mother to turn and see her. Dalryx looked at her, wondering what was going on. But he had no idea.[/size]

[captainstumpy]

Fox looked alittle confused as 2 more wolves joined them, "Hey" he said simply with a reather confused look in his face. "erm. you lost or somthing?" he said trying to be polite or helpful but achiveing nither, He was sure he hadden't seen them before but it was better to be polite, especaly becuase there were 2 of them he guessed they were together.

[smilies]

Almira's gaze was still fixated on the den when the two other wolves approached in the clearing. She didn't turn around until Fox rudely asked if they'd been misdirected. She turned around, and at the sight of the wolves, she breathed in, a natural instinct she'd developed while in her puphood. It was a simple way to tell if they were part of a pack or just loners. But other than the smell of where they'd come from a different scent enveloped her entire being, invading her nostrils unwelcomed. It was a fairly familiar, but long forgotten smell, but now it brought back flashbacks from a long ago. Inwardly, she'd let out a growl, and her playful smile seemed to melt off her slender muzzle as she studied the female more closely. She sighed. The moment had come way too soon. And although part of her told her to run, the other told her to stay put and take this, deal with it, because it would only catch up with her later. The playful gleam in her eyes seemed to fade. She should've gotten this over with sooner, but of course she'd been stupid, she'd procrastinated and now look where it got her.

It seemed like minutes that she stood there, unable to speak, and her mobility disabled. Fear seemed to grip her. She was afraid of what her daughter thought of her, what she would find out about her other pups, and most importantly Josiah. And then there was the fact of what she'd tell her daughter. The truth seemed too hard. She cleared her throat, as she racked her brain for the pup's name. Her and Josiah had had so many pups, and quite frankly, Almira had nearly forgotten all of them. After all, it had been nearly a year, could you really blame her? Finally, as if someone had turned on a switch, the name popped into her head. Fallon. She figured seeing her face probably helped put a name to it. "Maybe we should take this somewhere else," she said softly in the direction of her daughter. If there was one thing she didn't want, it was causing a scene in front of a bunch of males, when emotions that she wasn't willing to be revealed may accidentally slip to the surface.

She turned away from her daughter, and headed off in the direction of the thick underbrush, only hoping Fallon would get the clue to follow. "And leave your boyfriend," she added with a soft growl in the unknown male's direction. She gathered her muscles and released them into a slow trot. Her heart pounded, feeling as if it would explode from her chest in a matter of minutes. There was so many things to discuss with her daughter, so many truths to be revealed. At the thought of telling her where she'd really been, she began to debate on whether or not to run away. But she remained a slow trot, not bothering to glance over her shoulder to see if Fallon was following or not.

What would she think when she told her she hadn't been injured in the earthquake? She could just picture how Fallon would react to "I ran away instead of moving with the pack." She let out a growl directed to herself, fighting an inward battle that she just wasn't winning. And then there was wondering what she thought of her. Did she hate her for abandoning her, her siblings, and Josiah? Did she even care that she was here, or would she only follow her to attack, and get her revenge? With a sigh, she stopped when she felt as if they were far enough from the little group that had formed in the clearing. She sat, her bushy tail tucking neatly around her as her eyes bore down on the spot where she'd arrived, awaiting her daughter's presence so they could get this over with.

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[Malo]

Fallon's green eyes watched her mother closely, her muscles tensed as she watched her face. She had never been able to read her mother, and she still couldn't now. But suddenly, she saw it. A glimer of recognition, and what seemed like shock. So she hadn't forgotten her precious first born afterall. Seeing her mother made her mind race-was her father alive? What about Omari, Denzin? Even that fool of a sister Naila had to had survived somehow, if their mother had. Guess her family was more resilient than she had first thought.

Hearing her mother's voice for the first time in a year, she nodded. She didn't follow because she was obedient-no it was because she too disliked showing emotion and she thought that doing so if front of a male she didn't know and a male she'd only recently met would be rather demeaning. She snorted and replied colder than she meant to, Dalryx is not my boyfriend, mother. I'd prefer for you not to think of him as anything more than a traveling companion.[/color] It had been so long...

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Dalryx meanwhile watched the two females exchange a look that he could not understand. He still hadn't figured out that the two were a mother daughter pair, though there were a few resemblences. At the sound of the word 'boyfriend' he scoffed. Ma'am, I am not this pup's boyfriend.[/color] The word slid off his tongue as if it was a disgusting taste he wanted his mouth to be rid of. He was much too wild to settle down now. Not that any fae had even remotely caught his interest. Hearing Fallon's own reply to the tanned female, his eyes got wide. That was her...mother? Well that explained the similarites, in looks and attitude. Glaring at Fallon's back for the clear insult, he shut his mouth and sat on his haunches, watching her saunter off behind Almira.

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Catching up with her mother, Fallon stopped walking. She sat back a few feet away, tail wrapped around her paws. Her eyes peered at her mother warily, searching for answers to questions. She found none. Her body was still tensed, as if she was afraid Almira would turn around and attack her. It had been such a long year...she'd had so many nightmares. So many questions came to her mind, but she couldn't find the right words to say, how to form complete sentences.

Finally, she opened her mouth, and the questions seemed to pour out. Where is Dad? Omari and the others, where are they? Are they alright? Is Dad still injured? What's home look like now? Is there any food now? Can we go back? Are they still alive?[/color] She closed her mouth, the words falling out in one long breath. She stared her mother down, her eyes demanding answers.

Even though Fallon was a shallow, cold, selfish, arrogant brat, she still cared for her family. She would never admit it, but she did care for them. She even loved them, but the world didn't need to know that. And her many questions just showed her terrible concern for them. Ugh, how embarrassing. Unable to handle herself, she stood up, pacing back and forth, unable to stand or sit still. She wanted to know. There was so much of her past left unanswered, and maybe her mother could help her...[/size]

[smilies]

She ignored the male, his words nothing but an insignificant blur in her ears. She released a sigh of relief as she heard the soft footfalls of Fallon behind her. Almira cringed in pain at the "M" word. How could Fallon still be able to call her mother so easily, as if nothing had happened? As if she hadn't been away for a year? But then again, Almira hadn't exactly told her daughter her story yet, but she knew it wouldn't be long until the "m" word became nothing but a distant memory in her pup's eyes. She hesitated a moment unsure of what she was going to do. She wasn't sure if she should tell her the truth to spare her the pain of knowing that her mother had abandoned her at such a young age, to defend for herself. As she watched Fallon approach a small shudder ran down her spine. They were nearly identical and quite frankly it was a bit eerie to see nearly a spitting image of herself.

She opened her mouth to begin what she'd dreaded for a year and then some, but quickly clamped her maw shut as Fallon spoke the first words. She listened as the questions poured unrelentingly out of her mouth. Of course, every question she'd come to find an answer to was unknown by her. She felt numb for a moment, unsure of what to think, how do react. If any of them were alive, surely they'd already be here. But apparently Fallon was the only one that had survived, not including herself. Her eyes glazed over as she began to sink inside her own thoughts, her mind seeming to surround her entire body. With a mental snap, she came to and studied her daughter. Every possible thing that could've went wrong, had gone wrong. Josiah had to be dead, the pups were surely dead. And even if they hadn't died in the earthquake, they had to have been too young to fend for themselves.

"Their not here." It wasn't a question, but a statement, all her fears, and yet her reliefs had come true. Josiah and the others had had to have passed on if they weren't here by now, and honestly this upset part of her, but another part deep down felt relief wash through her body, relieving her of revealing the truth to more than one wolf. It seemed like a cruel thought, but she couldn't change how she felt. She did...Care for Josiah and the pups very deeply, however, fear had taken a hold on her, and that's the only reason she'd left. Call her coward, and she wouldn't deny it. She had commited a cowardly action, but maybe it'd been for the best. "They must be dead," she said, her voice flat and holding no emotion. "They weren't in the valley when I left."

She stared straight back into her daughter's demanding eyes, not showing any emotion. That's when she decided to suck it up, and take it. What else could she do? She'd come to the end. And although she new that her daughter would be taking in a lot of bad news at once, there would have to be one more thing added to the list. "The reason I didn't travel with the pack after the earthquake, wasn't because I was injured," she began, her voice still hiding any emotion as she spoke in a matter-of-fact tone, making it seem effortless as the words rolled off her tongue and lingered in the air around them. "I'd left the valley when the earthquake struck because I wasn't....I couldn't stay there. I felt trapped. Pack life just wasn't for me." She took a deep breath, and looked to the ground, trying to muster up her strength to begin again, and also to allow Fallon some time to get everything sunken in, and settled.

"It's not that I didn't love you, or your brother or sisters, or your father," she began again, a bit emotion beginning to seep into her words. "I did...A lot." She said nothing for a while, her gaze still on the ground beside her front paws. Unless Fallon lived her life, she had no right to judge her, because she didn't know, has never known, and will never know every little detail about her. Almira didn't have trouble admitting to herself that she had problems having to do with her past, but she did have trouble admitting it to anyone else. "I'm sorry," she muttered, her voice brisk, and emotionless once more, as she lifted her head to stare into the eyes of her daughter.

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[Malo]

All hope in her heart was washed away as Fallon heard her mother speak. The words tumbling from her mouth-they didn't seem real. Her face dropped, and her expression went from hopeful to drained and finally, to one of utter disgust. As her mother's explanation hit her ears, every sentence, every word stung and left an ugly scar. Her green eyes, which had dulled and then brightened at the prospect of her family being here, turned cold and vicious, as if staring daggers into her mother's heart would just make her drop dead.

Finally, she found her words and the courage to speak. But her formerly hopeful pup-like tone had changed. You left us. She now stood, tall on her long legs, her large build matching her mother's height. She stared at her eye to eye now, never looking away. You left us when we needed a mother most. You left us when our father, your MATE was injured and couldn't care for us by himself. I thought I never saw you because you were out moping, or trying to find something better for us. But no. You ran away from us; YOUR FAMILY. When we needed you the most, to take care of us...She turned away from her mother. Her body was trembling, her eyes were filling with tears.

In her year of life, Fallon had never cried. She had never been overrun with emotions, never let them get the best of her. But now, it was like a caged beast had taken its last straw and broke free. Her body trembled not from sadness, but from anger. She bit her jaw, hoping to supress the urge to run up to her mother and sink her sharp teeth into her neck.

Turning back, Fallon took a step away from Almira, a low growl emitting from deep within her. She had taken care of her siblings and father all by herself, thinking that when she was gone her mother had actually been around. She shook her head, knowing now that that wasn't the truth-they had been abandoned, and not even at an age where they could actually fend for themselves.

She glared at her mother, eyes cold and emotionless as she spoke. You're a coward. Weak. You ABANDONED us, I don't care what you say. If you truly loved us, gave a damn about us, you would have stayed. 'Pack life just wasn't for me'. Well what the hell about family life, huh mommy dearest? We weren't good enough for you to stay around? Guess who took care of everyone when you were gone. Do you want to know? Me. Not even a year, and I had to take care of not only myself, but four others as well. I didn't know how to hunt, and I damn well couldn't nurse my brothers and sister. That was your job. To teach us, provide for us. But you couldn't even do that.

She growled again, not able to hold it back. Her fur was standing straight on end, and her muscles had tensed. She stood there, tall and stiff, staring down her mother, her former beta. She knew now she didn't deserve to even be called a former beta. She wished she could rip out her throat, go for her mother's jugular vein, anything. But she knew that if she did, then she would be completely and utterly alone in the word, save for Dalryx. I'm done here. I don't need you anymore-I don't need anyone. I've done fine by myself, see mom. And that's what I'll keep doing. Whether you live to see me become something or not. She turned, her back facing her mother as she began to slowly padded a few feet away. Tears were starting to stream down her face, and as much pain as it caused her that her mother left them, it would hurt even more to show it. No weakness now, she knew that. She made up her mind that she wouldn't be her mother. She wouldn't abandon the ones she cared for, not that there were many in the world who she did care about. She would be strong, with or without a pack, because she could do for herself, and others if necessary. She stood there silently crying, wanting to leave but finding that her legs wouldn't carry her. She still loved her mother, but now there was a burning hatred inside her heart.

[smilies]

For a while, Almira sat tall and took everything her daughter threw at her, each word seeming to be a blow to her heart. She'd prepared herself for this, and truthfully she deserved every word full of hate that was coming in her direction. Fallon made sense, everything she said was true, but it was only so long until her anger kicked in, and without thinking she released a snarl. "Don't talk to me like that," she snapped with a growl rumbling behind each syllable. She was the mother, and her instincts began to kick in. Her eyes blared into hers and as her daughter walked off, she followed close behind. "You don't know sh*t about me," she told her, her voice raising with anger. "You think I don't know this, you think I don't care," she continued, her rage making it hard to not lash out at Fallon and strike her jugular veing to send her spiraling into a quick death. But no, she couldn't do that. After all, Fallon was her daughter and as much as Fallon thought she didn't love her, Almira did.

"If I didn't care, I would've never come back. I would be wandering these regions without any of you, but I'm not. I came back, and you probably can't even imagine how hard it was to tell the truth, knowing full well that you wouldn't like what I had to say," she said, her voice lowering but the rage remaining behind every syllable of every word. "So don't dare tell me I don't care. You think I would've put myself through this if I didn't care?" she asked. She took a deep breath and turned away from her daughter. She'd said what she needed to say, and that was all she could do. Now she just had to see what Fallon would. "You can forgive me or not, but just keep in mind that I do care," she spat over her shoulder, before trotting off into the forest and back to the clearing. She returned with an emotionless expression, like nothing had happened and look around at the group that had formed.

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