hear you me -- open!

[Paint]

what would you think of me now?
so lucky, so strong, so proud
i never said thank you for that
now i'll never have a chance

The blossoms were coming out. Usually this was a warming sign to Rose, an indication of good things to come. Perhaps her belly had already been round this time last year, or still she'd been relied upon. Now her pups were grown, or growing, and many of them had gone their own way. Rose wondered why she never did, really. Raiden was dead, her first love, and her friendship with Justyn obliterated by one confused conversation. She sat and looked over the land, feeling the stones beneath her feet and the cold breeze whipping at her fur a little. Sadness clouded her dark eyes, now that she was alone, wondering why she had not left her pack yet.

Perhaps she was a coward. She still had her father, yes, but he was very old now. It was as if he refused to die. The packs were in an awkward stalemate. Rose would never have expected the Stars to leave their Alpha to rot and die, and yet here they were. The leaves had fallen, the snow had come and gone, and here they were. Rose hadn't even gone to check on Caden recently. She did not care for the fallen Alpha, feeling repulsed by his presence, but still, analytically, she couldn't believe he had been left. Her face betrayed little of what she was thinking, as usual, but inside she was storming with emotion.

Her father expected her to take over, if and when he died. Rose was cold, but she did not enjoy loneliness as he did. But did she want power? She wasn't too sure. Wrapping her tail around her more tightly, Rose resented the cold breeze. She looked forward to Spring and Summer, to the heat and light coming back, but not to the possibilities of what it brought. She had lived through an earthquake, a lost mate, births and deaths of her own pups, and yet she felt as if she couldn't possibly live through the changes that were coming. Perhaps there was a kind, strong male in a pack far away who would turn her into the mother that she so naturally was. Perhaps she could make friends, accept a Delta position, be at one with her fellow packmates. But what if they were weak? What if they did not respect or understand her? Would she ever relinquish the title of Ice Princess?

I may soon be the Ice Queen, she thought. Justyn had named her the Ice Princess, so long ago now, when he had supported and looked after her. Truthfully, she had loved him as much as she had ever loved Raiden. They were just so different. He could have made a good mate, they could have ruled easily together. Now she was alone. She'd scolded the Fire Prince for burning all of his bridges, but it takes two. She'd burnt the bridge too. The smallest sigh escaped from her muzzle as she turned and watched a bird circling in the morning sun. She shivered and returned to her normal composure, mind racing, heart throbbing.

may angels lead you in
hear you me, my friends
on sleepless roads the sleepless go
may angels lead you in

[Fire]

It was strange when Caspian thought about just how many siblings he had that he'd barely even met. Duke certainly hadn't wasted all the years he'd been alive, but perhaps it only seemed that way now that Duke was nearing the end of his life. He often wondered where his older siblings were, why Duke no longer seemed to care - about any of his children, really. Caspian could only be grateful that he hadn't inherited that from the old man. His bear-like build, sure, and the ability to suppress and conceal his emotions that all of them seem to have obtained, but at least he had a heart. It was a little twisted and warped; a little rough around the edges in typical Falling Moon fashion, but it was important to him, if only to distinguish him from his father. He'd received far too many things in the way of genetics from Duke for his liking.

Making his way to the dens for a rest, he stopped short when he caught the scent of one of his sisters. He couldn't recall having a real conversation with her at all; everything he seemed to know about her came from whispers and rumours. The Daddy's Girl, whom daddy no longer loved, with a dead mate, and a son that didn't remember her. If one believed the rumours, she'd also fallen out with her current mate - or best friend? - and was now well on her way to becoming a bitter old woman at the tender age of three. He wondered if she would want company, or if she would want to be left alone, and came to the decision that he was going to visit her either way.

He lumbered toward the clearing idly, watching with fascination as tiny rabbits and squirrels scurried away from his huge form as it moved through the underbrush. It made some dark, primal part of him light up with pleasure at being the creature that they feared, and if he weren't already on his way to do something he would probably spend some time stalking them, toying with them, just for the fun of it. As it happened he was already occupied, and he came upon the Sloped Clearing above the dens before he could consider chasing rabbits and finding Rose later instead. Her bright white coat stuck out against the dark dust and soil, the snow already almost completely melted away as Spring reared it's ugly head.

He leapt up the clearing with what little grace his thick, heavy bones could muster until he was a mere couple of metres from his elder sister. Caspian nodded a curt greeting out of respect, his dark eyes guarded as he used them to search for some emotion in her own that could alert him to her mood. As he expected, all he could see was the same cold, emotionless look that he knew to be mirrored in his own. Despite being family, he didn't think he could even begin to fathom what her emotions were behind her façade, and wondered if she would be willing to open up to him. It seemed unlikely, but perhaps she would appreciate his company anyway. "Rose," he greeted, sitting down and waiting for her response.

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Rose was so completely lost in her thoughts that she jumped a little when Caspian greeted her. Her lack of awareness shocked her a little. He could have been trying to kill me, she scolded herself, and then calmed down. You could take the wolf out of the Moons, but you couldn't take the Moons out of the wolf. She stared at him for a moment, returning the curt nod, recognising him as her half-brother Caspian. If he was anything like that stuck-up brat Kohar she would probably hate him. It was odd for a moment to see that build and those dark eyes again. Duke's genes ran strong in this family - eyes, or build, and broken personalities. But he had more of his mother's colouring.

"Caspian," she returned the greeting. For a moment she wondered whether his look was a searching one. She wondered why she didn't know him any better, and then realised what she must look like to him. Cold, superior, indifferent. Always wandering around alone, never asking for anyone or anything. And he was young, stupid perhaps. If he took after his brother Onisim in brains as well as build. But something about him suggested otherwise. Rose had never lacked in brains, and the greatest part of her intelligence was spent calculating her fellow kind.

Still, here she was alone, miserable, thinking of leaving, and he had approached her to say hello. She'd always had a bad relationship with her siblings, probably because of how close she was to her father once upon a time. She hadn't even given this generation a chance. So after a few minutes of silence spent watching him, Rose decided to break her self-imposed icy composure.

"How are you?" she asked, which may have sounded weak had it come from less confident lips. Before he could reply, she quickly added, "I'm afraid I don't know you all too well, little brother. Forgive me that." And for the first time in a long time, Rose smiled. It was brief, but it was genuine, and then it went away and she waited for his response. He may be cold and dark like the rest of them, and she may be shot down for a moment of brightness, but she did not care really. Let him see one of her many versions. She would see how he fared against a great actress, if he should cross her.

[Fire]

Caspian's head tilted to the side slightly at her surprise. He hadn't meant to catch her off guard, hadn't even thought his approach could have surprised someone. She didn't react as coldly as he had anticipated, though, so perhaps she was willing to talk to him after all. He observed her with a quiet intensity for a few beats after she spoke, only allowing a small smile and a huff of laughter once a slither of her own emotion slip. "Not to worry, big sister," he replied, leaning a little closer to her conspiratorially. "I admit I haven't been...too friendly myself." He smiled at her again in what he hoped was at least a little comforting, before letting it fall away from his face.

He felt as though he had a lot that he wanted to say and no real way to say it. The problem with the Falling Moons was that you couldn't even trust your family. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again with a huff. "I'm fine," he settled on. "Yourself?" So far Caspian had navigated through life observing rather than participating, and now that he was participating the words felt dry on his tongue. And yet he was determined to get it right, because what he'd observed throughout his almost-year of life was that being the strong, silent type (read: Duke) never worked out. Or at least, it was something to be improved upon. Caspian was aware of course that Duke was a strong leader, but he wasn't the best. He couldn't tell yet what it was that Duke was doing wrong, but it was definitely to do with communication. Duke didn't even feel like a part of pack to Caspian. He felt so distant, like a god or a King, and that wasn't enough. It wasn't enough to be a good alpha, or a good parent.

But thinking about his father's mistakes was already becoming tiresome to Caspian. He lifted his head up a little and looked back at Rose, thinking about how her own pups were his age now, and how Rose would probably take over once Duke eventually died. Possibly Kohar and Binah would stick their nose in, or even himself. Looking at Rose it felt odd to know that they could be vying for leadership of the pack - if that was what he wanted.

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Rose dipped her head in understanding at his comment. 'Friendly' wasn't exactly on the Falling Moons agenda. She watched him as he seemed to search for words, and she recognised that feeling. When did they all become so repressed? Had it always been this way? What had been a violently chaotic group of wolves was perhaps giving way to something more normal, and now... was it possible that the pack had changed, but the expectations had not? Questions raced through Rose's mind but, much like her brother, she did not think it was the right time to voice anything too dark or deep.

"Could be worse," Rose replied honestly. "Could be much better."

The moment of self-pity was a flash in her eyes, a glance at the ground, before she tried to ice over again and stare outwards at the lands beyond. Rose looked back at him, glad that he had called her his sister. It was a step, anyway. You had to have allies in this pack. Friends, maybe, but they could be volatile. Rose had lost too much now. She wasn't sure that she would ever shake the feeling of Justyn from her- she was still irked by his presence, curious about what he was doing. Quietly, bitterly and embarrassingly jealous that Fallon had 'won' him.

"Do you have a mate, Caspian?" Rose asked with a slight frown. She didn't want to get too personal too quickly with him, but she was genuinely curious. "I get the feeling that the pack will not be growing too much this Spring."

[Fire]

Caspian made a small noise of agreement in the back of his throat, gazing out at their father's land with the solemn expression that had become his default. He wondered idly why the Dancing Stars hadn't come to rescue their Alpha yet. What he expected from them he couldn't be sure, but nothing? Well, he hadn't expected nothing. He'd been under the impression that they were as strong as the Falling Moons, driven by love and not hate and all that crap. Turns out they were all wrong. Duke was wrong. The Dancing Stars either didn't care, or didn't care enough about Caden to rescue them. Or, they didn't want to risk losing their lives, which was sensible really, but felt like something the Falling Moons would do. Perhaps they weren't so different after all.

His ears twitched minutely at her words, hauling him out of his thoughts. She was so quiet he'd almost forgotten her presence, which was pretty impressive. "No," he answered, unsure whether or not that needed explanation. Honestly, he hadn't even begun to think about finding a mate. There weren't exactly an abundance of females in the pack. Or males, for that matter. The pack felt so small, and disjointed, that he wasn't really sure what was holding it together. It certainly wasn't their Alpha, or their Beta - a Dancing Star but also apparently Duke's long lost grandson. Rose's son, he'd heard. He turned back to her with an imperceptible look. "Bion's your son, right?" His voice was quiet but there was no sense of tact or subtlety, sounding almost critical without meaning to, as if Bion were her fault. Realising his lack of consideration, he shook his head and attempted to correct himself. "I didn't mean that...I'm sure he's..." It was no use. "I just don't know what he's doing here. Is he here because of you?" Caspian just wanted to understand. The pack could do with more members, really, especially tough looking ones such as Bion. But he'd seen the wolf around, and he just didn't feel like Moons material.

Whatever, he thought. Bion was going to have to prove himself as a Beta, and if he sucked than he'd get kicked out of the pack, royalty or not. Being related to Duke certainly hadn't won him any favours within the pack, and that was for the best. "I reckon the Stars won't be growing too much over Spring, either. If they're still alive, that is. They've been pretty quiet; sometimes I forget we've got their Alpha." 

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At the mention of Bion, Rose turned sharply to her younger brother and raised an eyebrow. She heard him out as he stumbled through what he said. She pondered his response for a while, wondering what he really thought of their new Beta. She sighed a little, shaking her head dismissively. This was not directed at Caspian. He went on talking about the pack, but Rose felt that she owed him whatever explanation she could.

"Yes, he is my son. I'm not sure if he believes that, however. He lost some of his memory. Perhaps he's trying to find his way home, in some way, but honestly... no. I don't believe he's here for me."

No one is, she mused with a bitter taste in her mouth. Her dark eyes betrayed little, but she realised that she was being rather forthcoming with emotion in her voice. Well, for her. It might be disdainful and cold, but it was emotion nonetheless.

She waited a moment, glancing over towards the opposing lands and considering what Bion had said.

"I wonder if he's still alive," she mused. "To be honest, I think both of us seem to have our tails firmly between our legs. They haven't attacked, yes, but neither have we. I feel as though they've called our bluff."

They were smarter, or more cruel, than she had given them credit for. It was interesting.

[Fire]

Rose's words caught Caspian by surprise, and he was momentarily too surprised to react. So far he'd only heard rumours, and ones he'd doubted at that. He supposed it did make sense though; why he'd come back and why he hadn't been here all along. It wasn't hard to see the physical similarities either, once you knew to look out for it. Most of his genetics seemed to have been passed directly from Duke to him, though. You and me both, nephew, he thought. 

Nephew. Now that his entire interpretation of Bion was skewed, he almost wanted to meet him again to re-assess his opinion. Now that he was family, Caspian almost felt warmth toward him. He'd have to keep that in check.

His attention snapped sharply back to Rose when she paused, his black ears flickering delicately as he studied her careful composure. It wasn't hard for  him to see her repression. She was good at it; keeping her emotions in check. And he understood completely. In this pack, sincerity meant vulnerability, ergo weakness. Clearly Bion and his companion had not yet learned this yet, as they would if they had been born into the pack. It felt as though the notion had seeped into him from the very moment he'd been born. Rose seemed to him like a being overflowing who was posing as an empty shell, and it made him sad. Some part of him at least. He felt pity, and empathy, and the desire to figure out what she needed so that he could help her. Instead, he looked away.

He looked out at the horizon; the point where mountain met sky and then continued in the vast expanse of blue and grey oblivion. 

"Have you given up on him yet?" He asked. "Bion, I mean." He blinked a few times as her change of topic sunk in. "I suppose we have no need to attack them. Without their alpha they're dissipated and leaderless, they're vulnerable. We have the better lands, the upper hand. We could attack at any time, maybe that's the point. As long as they think we might attack at any moment, they'll be the powerless ones." He paused in thought. "I suppose that works both ways, though. They might think we're the ones living in terror." He let out a hollow, humourless bark. "What would you  have us do, Rose?"